Parents can help their teens work through main character syndrome by encouraging teamwork, community involvement, and .
Does your child tend to dramatize life events, painstakingly detail their life on social media, or seek constant attention and validation -- especially online? If so, this could be a sign that they are "starring" in a dramatized version of their life where they're always the most important character. Sometimes referred to as main character syndrome, this phenomenon is not an actual mental health diagnosis, even though some of the characteristics may mirror .
If you think your teen might be showing signs of main character syndrome, experts break down everything you need to know about this phenomenon.
Main character syndrome (MCS) is a term often used to describe a mindset where individuals view themselves as the protagonist in the "story" of life, sometimes to the point of disregarding others' experiences, says Shari B. Kaplan, LCSW, a licensed clinical social worker and clinical director at Cannectd Wellness.
"In teens, this can manifest as a , often fueled by the ," says Kaplan. "While this may be part of normal adolescent development as they form their identity, it can veer into unhealthy territory when empathy and awareness of others diminish."
Similarly, Caitlin Slavens, MC, a child psychologist at MamaPsychologists, describes someone with main character syndrome as "someone [who] acts like the star of life's movie and everyone else is just part of the supporting cast."
"For teens, this might mean seeing themselves as the center of attention or narrating their lives like they're in a TikTok montage," she adds.
According to Slavens, main character syndrome is not inherently bad. After all, it's developmentally normal for teens to think about how others perceive them, she says. "But it can disconnect them from reality or other people's feelings when it becomes excessive."
Likewise, it's important to note that main character syndrome is not truly a "syndrome," says Brett Biller, PsyD, a psychologist and mental health director at Hackensack University Medical Center.
"Syndromes typically have a foundation in professional medical and mental health communities and are grounded in empirical efforts. Not uncommon in our current society, the term 'main character syndrome' appears to have been born on social media."
While , Biller says it also greatly influences thoughts and feelings. This could cause people to view main character syndrome with greater significance than should be assigned, he says. "Despite having an identified set of features, main character syndrome is neither an empirically supported syndrome, nor an existing diagnosis."
Even though main character syndrome is often talked about on social media, it's important to recognize that it is not a mental health condition. Therefore, the signs and symptoms of this phenomenon are based on the observations and experiences of others and are not meant to be a medical diagnosis. With that in mind, Kaplan and Slavens say you may see the following behaviors in your child:
While main character syndrome can sometimes be playful and harmless, Slavens says that other times these signs might signal more profound struggles with self-esteem or connection when taken to the extreme. If you notice these signs or symptoms in your teen, talk to their pediatrician or a mental health professional for advice.
According to Slavens, social media is practically designed for main character syndrome. "Teens can carefully curate posts, filter photos, and craft the perfect narrative. The pressure to present an idealized life can blur the line between reality and performance. Every like or comment reinforces the idea that their online persona is their true self, making it harder just to be."
When kids spend hours curating their online lives, Slavens says they also can fall into the trap of tying their self-worth to how others perceive them. The comparisons become constant and they may ask themselves: "Why doesn't my life look as exciting as theirs?" or "Am I as popular as so-and-so?"
"Over time, this can erode self-esteem and fuel anxiety, depression, or feelings of inadequacy," she says. "A curated life can feel like a performance, leaving teens emotionally exhausted and disconnected from their authentic selves."
What's more, teens -- and even some adults -- assume the information and stories shared by others on social media reflects reality, says Biller. "However, often what is reflected on social media is 'selective reality.' That is, social media reflects what the author wishes for others to see, hear, and believe."
Social media also provides the opportunity for people to create characters in an effort to influence others, explains Biller. "Those characters are often perceived by adolescents as authorities in a manner that lacks reference to the impact of their actions. As such, adolescents that lack self-confidence and are influenced by developmentally typical narcissism, will attempt to adopt a reality that is similar to the selective reality depicted on social media."
This, in turn, can result in main character syndrome.
Growing up in a society with consistent access to a selective reality on social media that often doesn't reflect true reality, can result in pressures, expectations, and beliefs that are difficult or impossible to realize, says Biller. "Over time, with continued efforts to parallel their reality with the controlled perceptions presented on social media, [teens can experience] an and general emotional well-being."
They also may have strained relationships, especially if their friends feel overlooked or undervalued, says Kaplan. And, it could be challenging to form genuine connections if they prioritize image over substance. Teens can even have a tendency to withdraw from real-world interactions that don't align with their curated "story."
Interestingly, there also are positive aspects to main character syndrome, says Slavens. "It can feel incredibly empowering. Seeing yourself as the main character can encourage confidence, ambition, and the belief that your life is worth celebrating."
It also can push teens to take risks, try new things, or overcome challenges because they see themselves as capable and resilient, she says. "The key is balance -- channeling that energy without losing sight of others."
Kaplan says other potential benefits include:
If you're concerned your child is falling into the social media trap of main character syndrome, Slavens suggests you foster self-awareness and encourage your teen to pause and reflect on their actions. Ask questions like: "How does this affect others?" or "What do you think this says about who you are?"
"Emphasize the importance of community, empathy, and shared experiences to help them find a balance between their online persona and real-world connections," she says. "Instead of ignoring their main character moments, recognize and validate their need to feel seen, but remind them they're part of a much bigger story, much like everyone else."
Remember, the goal is not to make your teen less confident. You should develop a secure and non-judgmental relationship with your teen. Focus on loving them, offering mentoring, and connecting with them consistently.
"Also be the person you are educating and mentoring your teen to be," Kaplan adds. "If you don't know how, seek out the guidance of a therapist that specializes in teen parenting and healthy secure attachments."
While MCS may share some characteristics with narcissistic personality disorder, it is not the same, although it can lead to some similar consequences like strained relationships, unrealistic expectations, reduced empathy, and self-esteem issues. This phrase was born on social media and its effects can be combatted with intervention from parents.